Saturday, 27 September 2008

  • Entry #60: Heroes Within Us pt.1: In pursuit of happiness

    Hey yo~~~/

       Well now, its a new quest for me to embark.  My princeship quest has come to end (at the moment) and now I'm doing heroic deeds.  I am beginning to realize that this is part of my princehood anyways.
       This entry, however, has nothing to do with me perse but it has much to do with another great hero who passed away three weeks ago on September 8th.  I told myself that I would dedicate the first entry of this series to him.
       It came to me as a shock to see a great person pass away.  I am not related to this person or am I a big fan.  I just happen to admire him through the journey he had.  This person I'm referring to is Evan Tanner.
       Evan Tanner is an MMA fighter.  He was an inspirational fighter since the days when I started to follow MMA.  His storyline involves a fatherly-like figure who competes in matches against fighters who are young and possibly arrogant.  He defeated fighters such as: Phil Baroni; Robbie Lawler; Paul Buentello; and Heath Hearing.  He was an adventurer who did many things and had many jobs over the years.  I cannot state what jobs he did other than that some were normal such as working at a store, some were isolated such as working in a farm and some were very daring such as outdoor research.  He was also playing hero by being a body guard someplace.  He may have a total of 8 jobs at least!
       After his title lost against Rich Franklin who practically mauled his face inside-out, he went on to pursue his own happiness.  He wanted to have a timeout from UFC.  His journey was great when he defeated named fighters and I followed it and was inspired.  Ever since that lost, he never came back to the UFC in a long time.  I still managed to continue my UFC liking with new faces from The Ultimate Fighter shows from season one and two.  When I finally saw him again, he had this big shaggy beard like he was Fred Penner.  I almost thought he was Fred Penner!
       He wasn't the same person I knew during his victories early back.  I don't know what happened during his time off but I was starting to think he lost himself after that title loss.  Even though there were a few fights in between the Rich Franklin fight and the last fight with Kendall Grove, it seems to make sense to me the order of when I watched it.  After his title loss, Evan Tanner lost his happiness...
       Evan Tanner was never the same again.  Not even his outside jobs and adventuring could claim that back.  His mind and heart was still in the UFC.  He even admitted that fighting was something he loved.  As if pure competition can give him the bliss he wanted--to be the best.
       His last fight was 3 months ago and I was there to watch it live on television.  When it comes to the staredown, he normally has this snicker on his face normally saying, 'you're in for a tough fight'.  This time, he doesn't give the smile.  Instead, he becomes serious and very pissed off!
       It was sad to know, however, that this fight wasn't just any fight.  It was a fight to see who still has it in them.  Its practically a fight where the loser retires and will never come back to the UFC.  Both Tanner and Grove were on a losing streak and this one will try to get them back on their feet--at least one of them will.
       My hopes were going for Tanner to take this match after his glorious stoyline during my time when I watched him.  Even though I was watching it live, I couldn't shake the fact that it wasn't the same man anymore.  I almost wanted to tear up seeing get beaten like this.  He was having great difficulty that I couldn't explain.  I even tried to willed him on but--he seems to be at the end of his--life...This was it...This was going to be the end of the great Evan Tanner...
       I never saw death but I saw retirement in the UFC.  In fact, I see retirement in MMA.  Even though he didn't beat out Grove, he fought valiantly and fought with his heart.  Wherever he goes, I hope he finds his happiness once again.
       Before my internet came crashing on my computer a little over three weeks ago, I was reading up on the UFC site and found that Evan Tanner was part of a Harley Davidson Convention.  I was glad to see that he was still doing other things and having fun.  With that said, I knew it was okay to see him enjoy himself and stop fighting.  It was a release that brought him happiness...
       That happiness was short-lived...
       During my work hours, I found out on the radio that Tanner passed away.  I couldn't believe what I was hearing.  I just saw him happy at a convention center.  What could be the cause of his death?  After further speculation up to this day, it narrowed down to a few things.  He could've gotten a heart attack when he went on a trip to the desert; he could've gotten a stroke due to heat exhaustion; or he could've died in pursuit of his happiness.
       I've said that a lot, 'in pursuit of happiness'.  This isn't like the Will Smith movie.  This was a life and death story and I believe Evan Tanner got his wish.  Before he died, he wanted to pursuit what he wanted the most and that is to be one step ahead of everyone else.  That is his happiness.  Before I end this entry, I realize that in pursuing your happiness can bring you the joy you want and you end up fullfilling the dream you always wanted.  When you think about it, you wish you can accomplish more than you can chew and wish you can redo the things you have regretted in your life.  In becoming a hero as I am now, I believe I have come to a point where I am following Tanner's foot prints.  His journey looks similar to the one I am embarking.  I pray that I have enough time in the world to think things through.  I pray that Tanners soul goes to a better place.
       Again, everything happens for a reason.  Upon writing this entry, I just found out that Evan Tanner has been buried today at the Civic Center at Amarillo, Texas.  May you rest in peace, hero.

    Faith:)

    ps: a special blog in the words of Evan Tanner.  This is his second last entry before he met his destiny...

    "I'm hoping that very soon I'll be sitting out in the quiet of the desert beneath a deep blue midnight sky, listening to the calm desert breeze. The idea going into the desert came to me soon after I moved to Oceanside. It was motivated by my friend Sara's talk of treasure hunting and lost gold, and my own insatiable appetite for adventure and exploration. I began to imagine what might be found in the deep reaches of the untracked desert. It became an obsession of sorts.

    "Treasure" doesn't necessarily refer to something material.

    Today, I ran to the store to pick up a few things, and with the lonesome, quiet desert thoughts on my mind, I couldn't help but be struck with their brutally stark contrast to my current surroundings, the amazing congestion in which we exist day to day. The landscape as far as I could see, crowded, choked, with me and the rest of the species, an almost writhing mass of organisms, fighting over space and resources,....on the highways, in the parking lots, on the sidewalks, and in the ailse of the stores. And to think, there are still places in the world where man has not been, where he has left no footprints, where the mysteries stand secure, untouched by human eyes. I want to go to these places, the quiet, timeless, ageless places, and sit, letting silence and solitude be my teachers.

    I've been gathering my gear for this adventure for over a month, not a long time by most standards, but far too long for my impatient nature. Being a minimalist by nature, wanting to carry only the essentials, and being extremely particular, it has been a little difficult to find just the right equipment. I plan on going so deep into the desert, that any failure of my equipment, could cost me my life. I've been doing a great deal of research and study. I want to know all I can about where I'm going, and I want to make sure I have the best equipment.

    One more week. I think one more week, and I'll be ready to go. "

    ~Evan Tanner (February 11, 1971 – c. September 8, 2008)

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